dreaming my dreams.I had a dream that I was strapped to the hospital bed
via heart monitor patches and a couple of short IVs.
I was staring at the ceiling of the room,
thinking of what time really was,
when I heard a double tap from the doorway.
I looked up and it was you standing there,
You strolled in and sat down and
the heart monitor missed a few beats
and we both chuckled nervously at it.
We exchanged hellos before you asked me
what was happening.
I told you about
the doctors confusion at my symptoms of cancer
without the cancer.
How they'd told me I had a weak heart,
and they really didn't know what to do about it.
You took my hand in yours
and I looked at you
I cried so hard that I woke myself up,
and I sat in bed crying,
because I knew that even if I did somehow
end up in the hospital with a grim looking future,
you wouldn't come, and
you definitely wouldn't care.
8.10.12he unsnapped her bra
along with her backbone,
caressing her shoulder blades,
holding her up by her collar bones.
she slid down his boxers
and stripped off his skin,
soothing his nerve endings,
laying him down by his veins.
but they couldn't love properly;
he was selfish in one eye.
i researched calla lilies for a piece of writing i did once, back in grade eight. they grow in somewhat tropical conditions, which made me think i could grow my own during the fall, since i live in florida. they're known as the champagne or marriage flower, because of their glass-shaped petals. they've been my favorite flowers ever since. though i do admit that white roses are a close second.
dandelions are technically weeds. they were my favorite 'flower' until i found that out. and so now, they're my favorite weeds, which is a bit odd, but oh well. the age-old legend that making a wish and blowing the dandelion's seeds off of it will make your wish come true is one that i've always admired. i feel as though i'm wishing on individual seeds. that's what they are. the dandelion's children. and we separate children from their mother in hopes of our wishes. but that's okay. they'll land and grow a whole new bath of kiddies for us to destroy. in my mind, dandelions are beautiful.
i am a safe.when i was four
my parents left me at home alone
because i was blubbering
and they were sick of trying to drag me away.
they left and closed the door and locked it
and i thought they'd really left me there.
i don't remember where we were supposed to be going,
but i remember seeing them carry my sister out the door,
and i remember hearing it shut and lock,
and i remember the house being dim,
and i remember being horrified.
i stopped crying and assessed what had happened,
then i burst into tears,
fell to my knees,
and hated myself for being such a hassle.
my mom came in five minutes later
to tell me that they'd never really have done that,
they were just teaching a lesson,
and needed me to go ahead and get in the car now.
so i got up and went.
my dreams have been stressful lately.
whether i'm running or crying or dying,
something is always intense.
i can feel suspense in the fake air around me.
i feel like it's a sign,
something somewhere in each one is a sign,
but i don't know th
counting phosphenes.sometimes i imagine a couple
that can't agree on children.
so in the meantime they settle
to use protection
until they come to a conclusion.
he's poking holes in their condoms
while she sleeps and
she's taking precautionary birth control
when he turns his back.
i wonder if they're happy, anyway.
i had a dream.
i don't remember all of it, just tidbits.
i recall you setting our family's home aflame
and curling up with your notebooks in the fireplace
and shrugging when you realized you couldn't escape.
that time in the water
my lungs felt like they were on fire.
my skin prickled and i could tell my hairs were on end,
flowing in the liquid surrounding me.
and if i kill myself again
i hope i have the courage to do it in the nude.
heartbreaking work of staggering genius.i liked your smile even before i knew you. i admired your speech, your swagger, your intent look when focused on language, all from afar. but then we met, and everything was different. i admired those same things, but others crept in. your taste in things like music and literature and food, your talents, the way you said things. i think even to this day i hardly know your mind but i admire that too, nonetheless. i think i always have, even upon first sight, and i think i always will.
it's like when soda burns all the way down.
one time i had a dream that i was in a park somewhere that didn't exist and a group of children were playing hide and seek. they huddled around a tree and all but one of them flee'd to go hide while the seeker lay his eyes behind is hands and his hands against the tree. i heard him saying "one, am i dreaming? two, am i dreaming? three, am i dreaming?" he got to one-hundred twenty four and slowly backed from the tree and looked right at me. he looked straight thro
Catharsis | ix.a.
Raquel is bulb. She is constricted to a glass cage and metal wires and switches. Raquel doesn't control her life. There is another force that makes her live, and then kills her. Day by day she is slaughtered without thought from her murderer.
Raquel is a fire. She is powerful, bright, admired. Raquel can be small but hardly insignificant. However, she likes to burn big. Once she took out a forest and never wanted to turn back, to leave, to stop leaving a path of smoldering destruction. But alas, a rain came, and Raquel was put out until the next lightening strike.
Raquel is light. Raquel is seamless.